Day 90 June 14th

This morning I woke up to Parker asking me what time it was and it was 6:00. He was up early because he went to be extra early last night. He did not feel well.  We laid in bed for about another hour and then got up. I told him he still could not come downstairs until 8:00 so that I could get my walk in and start my God time. I walked for about 40 minutes.  Today is my rest day so it was a very relaxing walk. 

For my God time I started a new Bible app reading plan with the women at my church. This one is titled “Finding God in the Change: Fight Fear, Fatigue and Failure”.  The thing that stuck out to me is “Opportunity is found in chaos” I love this! It is absolutely true. I have experienced this in almost every change or hardship I have gone through in my life!! I must remember as I enter into chaos, to keep my eyes open for the opportunity God had for me there.  I am a firm believer that growth and experience happens in the journey on your way to an end goal rather than when you get to the end goal. 

Today was an extremely fun and active day. We did more today than we have for the past 90 days combined probably! First we headed to Aaron’s brothers house for a bonfire lunch and to celebrate the twin cousins’ birthday and Addie’s birthday. The kids were so excited to see their cousins and had such a fun time! It was nice to feel normal again while being safe outside and not worried about COVID for once. Nancy had purchased several small gifts for the kids to run and find and the place into hula hoops she got them. They really enjoyed this fun game and all the treats that were included! 

After visiting there we met my mom halfway to pick up a power washer to borrow from her. She brought two of my sisters and my grandma with her! It was an awesome surprise! We also got to meet my niece that was born at the start of quarantine and we had not met yet and my other sister brought my nephew who just turned 6 months! We met at the same park my mom and I met at and visited for many hours. It was so refreshing to see them all! 

At the end of our visit it was already after 7:00pm so Aaron suggested we get some food out for dinner since we wouldn’t be home until around 8:00. I was hesitant but told him if he felt safe with it he and the kids could get something if they wanted.  Aaron and the girls chose Panda Express and Parker chose Chipotle.  Parker was anxious about eating from a restaurant so we talked him through the safety of it.  He also was very concerned all day about getting the virus, so we did a lot of processing of that as well. When we got home we put the food on plates, sanitized hands and they then crashed when we put them to bed:) 

Final thought and challenge: Although I was incredibly blessed with today’s events and people, I kind of lost it after we got home. I think it is due to being isolated for so long and then doing so much within a small amount of time. I went from pretty much zero exposure to total exposure to the virus. I questioned Aaron about the wisdom in what we did today. He stood by our choice to see our family.  I was feeling at peace about isolating and now I feel conflicted in my mind and heart about how much to do or not to do as we reenter. I am praying I start to feel less anxious about getting together with family and friends. Last night I felt like I wanted to pull back and not do anything again until Addie’s birthday gathering but I do not want to make these decisions out of fear so I will keep pushing myself to do safe activities. 

Did you have a re-entry stage? Did getting together with people for the first time in a long time mess with your mind? Did you feel like it was okay or that it was not wise? Did you pull back or just keep pushing forward?